sad today


June 19, 2009
This morning I tried unsuccessfully to resuscitate my 250GB external hard drive that crashed after my sister turned off the surge protector it was plugged into. It contains all the video I shot, logged, and edited in film school; my entire iTunes library; a couple applications; not to mention all of the digital photos I've ever taken. She told me to calm down, be optimistic, that I'll give myself high blood pressure from being so worried. I ask you. If all the research she's done over the past five years as a post doc got wiped out at the push of a button, I'm not sure she'd be any calmer.

Needless to say. I spent most of the morning sobbing (my 1-year-old nephew had to give me a hug) and I've been pretty useless at work all day. Running Disk Warrior right now seeing if I can fix it. I feel like a complete and utter zombie -- undone and anxious without my files. Emotionally exhausted. I live on relatively little technology, but I have to have some things -- and my music is one of them. Crazy how losing files or your laptop feels like losing a part of yourself.

If my book were on it I would not be writing right now; I would have smashed my computer into a million little pieces.

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